An update on my cancer journey after a very hard week 😞

 I cannot even stand the thought that the last time I did a blog post my momma was alive and well. There were no signs of cancer in her. We were living our best summer life and I had just been declared stable for another 3 months. My mom was ecstatic. She was and always has been my biggest cheerleader. Now here we are a few short months later and she has gone to heaven. It still is not real and I am so very heartbroken. I miss her so much that it aches. I long to pick up the phone and call her just to chat. She was my best friend. I love you for eternity mom. Thanks for being my angel…just in a different place now. 

Things felt even more heavy this last week because my next scan was “calling” it was time to check on my NET’s (neuroendocrine tumors) and see where things were at. So I did the scan Tuesday and met with my doctor Wednesday to go over results. Talk about scanxiety. I don’t know if it’s ever going to get easier. But it’s for the rest of my life so I’ve got to figure out how to get through the process a little better. I’m such a mess. I don’t know why…I know sometimes the cancer will have grown and sometimes it will be stable.  I think there are 2 reasons I was such a mess this time. 1- because of my dear mom, the hard moments we’d had in the days leading up to my scan. It just felt wrong that I had to worry about a dumb scan. And 2- because I’ve had the BEST summer and early fall. We have had so many fun adventures and I have been documenting all of the #living I’ve been doing and I have hardly thought about cancer while doing it. I so wanted that to continue. But…it was not to be so. Here is the update: Not the worst news but not the best either. The cancer is growing again. Enough that Dr Low feels we need to start treatment again.  He wasn’t alarmed but we talked about how we knew at some point it would grow again. That’s just the nature of NET’s! I will be starting oral chemo therapy as soon as my insurance approves it. It’s much easier to tolerate than the IV chemo. Still some side effects but not as intense. I will take it for 2 weeks then have 2 weeks off then again for 2 weeks then off. And that will be the cadence for now. I’ll scan maybe again later in December. And we will go from there. He’s treating a few other patients with a similar type of cancer and has had great success and they’ve had stability. And he said he’s had some where this treatment has worked even better and they’ve responded better than IV chemo. That is my HOPE and PRAYER! Thank you SO much for your concern, love, prayers, everything. Sure I’m a little bummed that it’s not still stable. But I’m mostly relieved that there is a plan forward and that my appt is over!! Love you all🥰